Thursday, March 11, 2010

Mayer


1980
USA

21 comments:

Marcie said...

Andre the Giant!!!

Anonymous said...

Is this Baron Underbeit before the accident?

Anonymous said...

UBER!

The Revolutionary said...

He looks as unhappy to be in this picture as I am to have to look at this picture of him.

Anonymous said...

Igor?

Mélodie said...

Oh my God, that's totally Baron Underbeit!!!

Anonymous said...

acromegaly??

*G*R*U*N*T*I*L*D*A* said...

Not exactly what I'd call "sexy" but he gets a pat on the head for showing up, and another pat on the head for being a military guy...

Anonymous said...

hawtorne?

Kelly said...

Sure, Mayer had secrets.

When children ran screaming at the mall he was never bothered. Sometimes the parents thanked him. Sometimes they were too drunk to care. Sometimes there were no parents.

The only thing that really got under Mayer's skin was when his Civil War Renactment corps was divided into two halves and given separate cabins at the post-enactment social. Lady Chagrin touched him with her bitter wings on those occasions, and he didn't care who knew. All those lace-draped belles seemed to end up in the South Cabin with Mike and Barry and Ed and Eustace, while the North was left subdued and stiffly awkward with ELO on the CD player and dumpy Quaker girls with facial moles fingering their heavily scotchguarded bonnets.
Mayer sipped his juice and gin and thought of passing it around, thinking it might loosen up some uneasy virtue. Then he glanced at the window toward the south and thought again, as the lantern visible on the distant sill was draped with a thin cowl of hot red organza. For a moment he thought he heard the sound of a dirty bassline drifted across the intervening meadow, but it could just have easily been the sweet, low chuckle of a lady discarding her corset before another reenacter and his hip flask of Wild Turkey.
Mayer had his secrets, but sometimes he felt like they were not worth keeping.

Pildora said...

brutal1!!!!!!!!!!

BlondeSoul said...

*shudder*
Give me the there's-a-zombie-standing-behind-me-isn't-there kind of willies!

Max Frost said...

Cadet H. Munster.

Anonymous said...

Wow, those are some big-ass lips, dude!

Anonymous said...

Lurch: The Military Years

SM said...

Bruce Campbell!!

Anonymous said...

"Buzz Lightyear to Star Command!
"

Anonymous said...

@Kelly
John Mayer's secrets?
This guy totally looks like his penis could hate black women. In fact, I bet his penis hates him.

Anonymous said...

Lurch joins the Marines.

John said...

do NOT fuck with mayer!

Anonymous said...

he could maybe be the next bond movie henchman? a name escapes me. just keep it mayer actually